Sorry but This is Really annoying...

I am sorry, but I need to vent a little bit. Ok so I think that it is alright for people, specifically girls to have drama in their lives. Everyone has it. Guys too of course. But there are two different directions you can take with your drama. One, the better way, is you look at what is happening and you accept it. If you can, you fix whatever happened and then you move on. It's not easy but at the same time it's as simple as that. You learn from any mistakes, make some changes, and those sorts of things happen less and eventually go away. I might relate back to that a little later, but I think that is the better response to drama.

Now, a worse response, is to complain and make it worse. I think it is terrible when drama happens to people (sorry but its mostly girls) and they cry and complain about somebody breaking up with them. Or even worse they complain that the same thing always happens to them and nothing ever changes (I think I might have said this about myself before and that is my mistake. I have made some changes). They don't try to change anything, they simply complain about how bad everything sucks.

I am sorry, but this really bothers me sometimes. Especially when someone says that they hate their life. Shut up. You don't hate your life. It could be so much worse...so much worse. Maybe if you actually did something about your drama and perhaps made some changes, things wouldn't be so "bad." Yes, it might be hard, but life is not easy. It is not supposed to be. And I do think there are definitely times when you can legitimetly but in a depressed mood. But it shouldn't be about drama. It should be when somebody you love is sick or is hurt or is dying or something like that. That is so much worse then when whoever you were dating broke up with you and then some other person was starting a rumor about you. It's okay, you will be alright.


I hope I didn't offend anybody with this, but it is what I believe. I am not saying all people are like this, but when I see it, it just annoys me. Talk to you later.
-Andy

Alex Zuelke...

...a running buddy and more importantly good friend of mine just made a blog. Ha the revolution continues on. So you should go read his blog, as well as stay updated on mine, just cause i like to hear feedback, but i guess if you read it that is cool. Anyways...Alex...you can get to his blog by clicking on the link on my page or also the url is beautyiscellardoor.blogspot.com...i think. And also if you havent, read my other good friend Ryan Haagenson's blog. there is a link for that on my page as well. And after all that, go make your own blog. Word. Talk to you later.
-Andy

(My friend Jackson just made one as well. check it out)

Companions For a Little While at Least

So I just looked at a picture and it made me think of something that I at least think is interesting and cool and such. I think its kind of crazy thinking about your shoes. Ya I know at first you just think of those things you put on your feet, and sometimes they look cool, or sometimes they are good for running, or sometimes they keep your feet warm, but if you think about it, that's not all. I think its kind of crazy just thinking about all of the places your shoes go with you...everywhere. They are with you all of the time. My shoes have been in so many places. My current ones have have seen the hills and mountains and plains while backpacking in New Mexico. They have gotten to know the halls of my school real well. They have been to all of my friends house just like I have. They have been with me through the good times and the bad. If you think about it, your shoes could be some of your best friends. I know I wouldn't be the same without them. Ha I think it would be pretty cool to just have a conversation with my shoes. We would be able to reminisce about all sorts of things. It was be a good time. Man I love my shoes. It will be a sad day when I have to retire them. They will always be remembered though. Anyways, just think about that...your shoes....crazy eh. Ha. Talk to you later.
-Andy

Tool is absolutely amazing....and such

Well I don't think I have blogged for a while so I figure now would be a decent time. Ha its one o'clock in the morning. I love it. And this blog will not be a list of things as the previous one was...as stated in its title.

So I went to go see the band Tool perform live tonight. They were absolutely amazing. By far they are my favorite band and I will always remember this night as one of the best of the year and of my life I think. I thought it was so amazing how tight they sounded. I know most bands are real tight especially ones that get paid a lot of money, but when you combine the tightness and precision they have onstage with their already amazing songs, it is bliss. I don't know exactly what it is about Tool that I like so much, but whatever it is I love it. I am not saying I shouldn't like them; I very much do, but they are unique. I don't know how to describe it. But like just at the concert listening to their music it takes me away from everything else, and it allows me to simply get into the music and bang my head around in the air even though no one else in my section is doing so. But everyone is doing thier own thing, enjoying the music their own way. It was fun. The lights were amazing and everything on and around the stage and such. Those guys are my heroes. I know they don't know or don't even care probably, but ya, I really look up to them. Anyways, I highly suggest listening to their music. I will help complete your life I promise.

Gosh I feel so busy this week. It's rediculous. I like it though. I would say that I am definitely taking advantage of these days that we have off. Last weekend I went to visit Belmont University in Nashville, Tennessee (I don't know if i spelled that right). I loved it. It was such a cool school. And their music business and audio engineering programs seeem amazing. It's is cool cause as part of a project in some of the classes you have to basically use their recording studio and record someone. I don't know about you, but that sounds like something I would really like to do. I am still applying to other schools mostly because I am already committed to finishing up the application process, but honestly, it seems pointless because Belmont is where I want to go the most. Hmm...I just thought I would share that bit of information.

One more thing I think I will talk about...girls. I was dating this girl basically for three weeks, two of which were unofficial, but last week we broke up. That was again one of my shortest relationships ever. I don't know why these things keep happening to me. I hate it. Like is there something that I am doing wrong. Am I not appearing to be committed enough. Am I not nice or sweet enough? and I too nice and too sweet? I don't know what I am really doing anymore. I have gotten used to being single and at the same time having an extreme desire to have a steady girlfriend. I desire so much that perfect relationship that I always see but can never get. So I think I put myself out there in a way that I am flirty with too many girls at once and then as soon as I start dating one my mind screws with me and tells me that I should have chosen another one. I don't know. Well I guess that was what sort of happened this time. (That was just one thing going through my mind). I mean like when I have a girlfriend I am committed to her for sure and I do everything I can to keep it going. I am always hopeful that it will be good from the getgo. But my mind still screws with me. And it always ends. Half the time, whether I am dating the girl or not, and there is a common liking for eachother, she suddenly decides that she doesn't like me anymore. I don't know eh. I mean I am certainly far from giving up. I never will, for one of my main goals in life is to get married to a woman who I love and who loves me and I want to raise a family. But...I guess that won't come easy. I suppose it's not supposed to. I guess all I really want right now is for a girl who will truly care for me and be there for me. But I know that I have friends who will be there for me as well which I am grateful and helps me get over the fact that I don't have a girlfriend like that. I don't know. I guess those are just some of my thoughts on that subject. If there appears to be holes, don't worry, there are. This is only a fraction of all of my thoughts. I am simply not good enough at relaying them all. Anways, thanks for reading all this. I will talk to you later.
-Andy

A List of Things

These are some things that I have been thinking about that could be topics for blogs or just simple sentences, but I don't feel like writing about it at the moment because there are many (I will probably add more to this list as time goes on).


-Techno is the shit.
-There is nothing to do in Sterling
-Pink eye is annoying
-You can't actually be high and have only one eye red
-Music really affects your mood
-People are always asking me where I am going to go to college
-My family is growing in a not so good direction
-It feels good to have a girlfriend (When I do have one)
-My hopes and fears of having a girlfriend
-Thinking about the past and how crazy it is
-This last year has been my most important because this time as opposed to ever before I can remember exactly what was happening a year ago
-One of my best friends is moving away in a couple of months
-Friends and good friends and relationships and change over time is intersting
-This whole college decision is going to be hard one. I know what I want most, but can I do it
-Adam Birt is the shit
-This winter is going to be pretty crazy for running. I have high hopes for track
-Guitar Hero is the shit. It's crazy fun playing with Jackson
-Al Gore really knows what he is talking about, and people should start to listen to him
-This country really needs a turn-around. Bush has been screwing it up far too long
-My life at this moment...I can't really complain

Hmm...this is kind of a boring blog, but I figured people probably don't want to read another serious blog. This one I think is rather not serious...still true stuff...but...ya. Talk to you later
-Andy

I am sorry...(expectations)

Expectations suck. They screw everything up. At least high ones do.

I am sorry dad. I am sorry when you have such high expectations for me and I fail to follow through and complete them. You always tell me you are proud of me and what I do in school and sports and everything. And then you tell me to do something that sounds simple enough and I don't do it. When I don't completely finish what you do you get mad, and it seem slike all of that pride in me doesn't matter. You give up on me and to you I am a failure. You know I am sorry for being a teenager, and I am sorry that sometimes what you tell me to do I really don't want to do. I am sorry that my priorities are rather different than yours. I ask you to do something or even I ask you a question, and you are busy at the time or in a bad mood or something and just get mad that I am bothering. But then I am busy or I have something going on and then you tell me I have to do something. It doesn't matter what I am doing I have to do it or else you will get mad and even more disappointed in me. Maybe if you didn't have so high expectations or maybe if for once you would see things from my perspective things would be a little better. Now I am not saying I am perfect. I am far from it. But that is part of life. You can't just give up on me whenever I screw up. I am sorry.
-Andy

23

I don't know if you have ever heard the song 23 by the band Jimmy Eat World. Thanks to Mr. Matt Keeler, I started listening to that song. It is absolutely amazing. I don't know if you have every noticed those songs where you listen to them and you feel like you are in a movie but when I am listening to 23, and I am driving or in the passenger seat or even walking down the sidewalk, I feel like I am in a movie. I feel like something bigger is going on with me. Something that is going somewhere and what I am doing will actually matter when the future comes. Or it is a sign that something big will happen in the future and that moment is an opening scene with the credits. I don't know. Either way, I am not actually in a movie when I am listening to the song. It does put me in one of those moods though where I become sort of quiet. I am not sad, nor angry. I am just in one of those modes where the feeling of being in a movie, which based on the song would be a rather serious movie, and I am in one of those thinking modes. It makes me think about life. It makes me reflect on everything that is going on at the moment. I kind of like it. That feeling is rather relaxing.

It is kind of an interesting thing. Everyone I am sure sees some movie and wishes that their life went almost exactly like that movie. I know I have sure seen movies, and I would kill to be one of the characters in the story. I would love to have all those thing happen to me. I think there are a couple of reasons why I as well as probably everyone else has these desires. They are kind of sad and can tend to make life seem so hopeless but they are what they are. The first I think is the more obvious reason why people wish they were in a certain movie, and I think that is because the movies that people want to be in always have great, happy endings. Everyone wants a happy ending. Unfortunately, that doesn't always happen. It seems like nothing ever works out like it does in the movies. The second and more deeper reason I think people want movies to happen to them is that they show that something greater in a sense is at work. That probably doens't make sense, but I will explain it. If you notice in movies, everything the characters do matters to the story. Whether it will affect the next scene or it will affect the ending, everything matters. But this isn't so in real life I think. I walked home from school today, but that will have no affect on what I do tomorrow. So many things we do don't matter. And people want everything to matter I think, just like in the movies. It is kind of unfortunate how things turn out I think.

And I think people look for something in movies that they are looking for in everything they do: hope. If a character in a movie succeeds against great odds, so must I be able to. But unfortunately, a lot of times I believe it is a false hope. Movies are great. I love them. But I believe they can tend to make me and people in general think that they can do anything, when in reality they can't. I think that people should not search for hope in movies. Hope I believe comes from within. I believe that it is something you must discover for youself. People can tell you that you should be hopeful that things will work out, but you must find that hope and grasp it and hold onto it. That is what is really going to get you through your problems. If you have hope, not false hope like in movies, but hope that things will work out in the end, then they will. Maybe things won't work out exactly as you like them, and maybe the end is not what you were looking for in the beginning, but whatever end you do come upon, it will be good, as long as through it all, you find that hope and stick to it and keep your head up. Hope leads to believing and believing leads to knowing that things will work out.

(And I think I have written enough. Ha reading over that I felt like I poured out so much emotion, but people will read this and be like oh, that's cool I guess. Whatever...maybe not. I don't know.)
Talk to you later.
-Andy